Powerful And Timeless Message For Married People and Single People Who Want To Be Married One Day

This message goes right in line with the one I posted last week entitled:
Love is a choice, a decision!

I am certain Steve McNair NEVER thought his affair would end in his death and yet his four young children are now left without a father. Steve's wife has to deal with the fact that her husband was unfaithful to him and now dead and now has to raise four children alone, children who will one day learn of the circumstances that took their father away.

If you are married and having an affair, it is only a matter of time before you pay a price--you can count on that! That "price" is different for everybody, whether that be the end of your life as in Steve McNair's case or/and the end of your marriage or/and the loss of respect from those around you, or/and a sexually transmitted disease or/and on and on and on.

If you are single and think that having sex outside of marriage is ok and saving yourself for marriage is outdated and old-fashioned, then please, look in the mirror so you can see a real, live fool! You are stting yourself up for lots of pain and disappointment. Some of the prices for your sin (and yes, in 2009 sin is alive and well) are sexually transmitted diseases that may take years to show up (and condoms are not and never have been "safe") and may lead to your death, pregnancy which may lead to abortion (traumatic for you and deadly for your baby) single-parenting (very hard emotionally and financially and your children will suffer--don't fool yourself otherwise.), heartache, feeling used, and on and on and on.

Single people: Did you also know that by giving in to sexual temptation now, you are setting yourself up to one day cheat on your spouse. NOW is the time to develop sexual discipline and integrity. It will NOT "magically" just appear on your wedding day!

My favorite analogy is this: Fire in a fireplace is beautiful, warm, and romantic. Fire outside the fireplace and in the living room is scary, deadly, and destructive. The same goes for sex. Sex in the confines of marriage with your spouse is beautiful, warm, and romantic. Any sex outside of the marital union (including masturbation, pornography, etc.) is incredibly destructive and harmful! PERIOD!

Please read the message below, it is long but so worth your 3 minutes!

truthfully,

Marisela

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Last weekend came the tragic news that former All-Pro NFL quarterback Steve
McNair was shot 4 times and killed, found dead with a young woman who had a
single gunshot wound to her head. McNair came out of a small college,
Alcorn State, and went on to a great pro career with the than Houston Oilers
that moved to Nashville and became the Tennessee Titans.

"Air" McNair as he was known, was a tough player who led the Titans to their
only Super Bowl appearance several years ago, where they ended up 1 inch
from the goal line on the last play of the game, losing to the St. Louis
Rams by 7 points. McNair had a wife, 4 children, and was known as a great
guy who did lots of great work in the community. That is why the details of
his death are so sad.

As it turned out, McNair was killed in a Nashville condo he was sharing with
his 20-year-old girlfriend. She was a very troubled young lady, had told
friends prior to last weekends tragedy that she was worried about her
finances, had seen McNair with another woman days earlier, and had thoughts
of "ending it all." Last Saturday as McNair slept on the couch, she pulled
out a gun she had bought a few days earlier, shot him in the temple, shot
him 2 more times in the chest, and than one more time in the other temple.
She sat down next to him, put the gun to her head, and pulled the trigger
ending her life.

This sad story is a great reminder to men and women who are cheating on
their spouses, SIN HAS A PRICE. Sometimes you will pay the ultimate price
for your sin. While you think you are getting away with your sin, never
forget God is watching. In the end, is it worth the cost? Satan is so
crafty as he entices men and women to sin. It looks so attractive. It
looks so perfect. He knows your weaknesses. He will give you all the
justification you need. Once you give in, all of a sudden the bill for your
sin starts to come in. It is like getting a $5,000 water bill, or a $12,000
electric bill. Satan is only going to laugh at you when you complain about
the price!

Would you be Concerned if your Husband or Wife Read your Emails or Instant
Messages? What about listened to your phone calls? What about if they knew
every place you go each day? How about the places you go when you are out of
town? Would you worry if your husband or wife heard a tape of all the
conversations you had each day with people of the opposite sex? For those
who are still reading, you either have no problem being this open with your
spouse or you are now under great conviction and God is speaking to you
today.

For those who have no problem being this open with your spouse, praise God!
A marriage centered in Christ should include this type of openness and
transparency. With Christ at the head of your life and loving and honoring
your spouse as the Word calls for, there is no reason you should be afraid
to allow your spouse to read your emails or Instant Messages, listen to your
phone calls, know exactly where you are at, or hear any of your
conversations with people of the opposite sex. I pray that you will continue
to love and honor your spouse so that you can always be this open and
transparent.

For those who are under conviction by these words today, this could be the
very tap on the shoulder from God that will keep your marriage from ending
in divorce. Satan is very subtle in how he destroys marriages. No marriage
ends in divorce overnight, but over time. One of the chief ways people open
the door for satan to come in and destroy their marriage is in their
relationships with people of the opposite sex. If your heart began racing as
you read those questions, if you know deep down you would never want your
spouse to read your emails or Instant Messages, hear your phone calls, know
exactly where you are at all times, or hear a tape of the conversations you
have with people of the opposite sex, please hear what God is saying to you
today. It may very well save your marriage!

Nobody wakes up one morning and decides to become an alcoholic. They have a
few drinks, it becomes part of their life, and over time they get into
bondage to alcohol. Nobody wakes up one morning and decides to become a drug
addict. They experiment with drugs occasionally, begin to use them more
frequently, and over time they get into bondage to drugs. It is the same
thing with someone who is in bondage to food, shopping, gambling, making
money, sex, or any other type of bondage you can name. A person doesn't get
into bondage to anything overnight, but over time.

This is also how relationships outside of your marriage develop, over time.
You get friendly with someone of the opposite sex at work, you see them
every day, you make sure you spend some time with them every day, talk to
them every day, you start to develop that elementary school crush and
fantasize about them, pretty soon you create opportunities to have lunch
with them or see them after work, and during this process the conversation
turns from work to your personal lives and often to sex. One thing leads to
another and one day you and your co-worker are in bed together.

Even if this relationship never culminates in having sex together, never
forget that Jesus said if you lust in your heart you have committed
adultery. You are giving someone else the emotions, feelings, and attention
that should ONLY be given to your spouse. When you got married, that is the
person God gave you for the rest of your life to pour all of your emotions,
feelings, love and attention into. NOBODY ELSE! That is the person who God
gave you to enjoy sex with. NOBODY ELSE!

Satan's new lie to people that there is really nothing wrong with carrying
on a relationship with someone "online." The reality is, you begin to pour
your heart, emotions, and feelings into this person you are having the
online relationship with just like if you were with them in real time.
Ultimately, in most cases it actually does evolve into meeting in real time
and ends up being no different than any other extra-marital affair. It all
started so harmlessly. A few innocent emails and Instant Messages that
became more frequent, more personal, more sexual in nature. The next thing
you know you are actually sitting side by side with this person.

Again, even if this relationship never culminates in having sex together,
never forget that Jesus said if you lust in your heart you have committed
adultery. You are giving someone else the emotions, feelings, and attention
that should ONLY be given to your spouse. When you got married, that is the
person God gave you for the rest of your life to pour all of your emotions,
feelings, love and attention into. NOBODY ELSE! That is the person who God
gave you to enjoy sex with. NOBODY ELSE!

I love you and care about you so much. Pray for the families of Steve McNair
and this troubled young woman who killed him and herself. They need the
Lord's strength during this difficult time. Today's message is a warning
that you must guard yourself from opening the door to satan, allowing him to
enter into your marriage and destroy it through your relationships with
people of the opposite sex.

If you are married, you simply cannot allow yourself to get too close to
someone who is not your spouse. You have got to be aware this is an avenue
the enemy will use to try and destroy your marriage. The way you judge if
you are getting too close to someone of the opposite sex is by answering the
original questions I posed. If the answer to any of them is "yes," you need
to back off because you are too close to that person.

I will be praying for those of you today who God brought under conviction
because you know that you would NOT want your spouse to read your emails or
Instant Messages, hear your phone calls, know all the places you go, or hear
the conversations you are having with people of the opposite sex. Be like
Joseph and RUN from this relationship NOW before it destroys your marriage.
God is speaking to you today and God is trying to help you save your
marriage. I will be praying for you to listen to Him and cut off ALL
communication with this other person.

I already know many of you will email me and tell me that your spouse
doesn't understand you, that you have "grown apart," and a whole plethora of
reasons to try and justify your involvement with someone who is not your
spouse. SAVE IT! Let me encourage you that if you put the same time, effort,
emotions, feelings, and energy into your spouse as you do this other person,
you would be amazed at how different your relationship with your spouse
would be. Whatever the problems in your marriage may be, being involved with
someone else is NOT the answer. I will pray today for God to bring healing
and restoration to your marriage. The first step, however, is to cut off all
communication with this other person you are involved with.

I will also be praying today for those of you who are dealing with a spouse
who has become involved with someone else. Never forget, you are not
responsible for the actions of your spouse. God gave us each free will and
only He can change your spouse's heart. Now is the time to make your faith
real and learn to trust God during this difficult time. Find your peace and
strength in Him each day and know that He is still in the restoration
business! I will be praying for you and for your spouse to turn their heart
and life back to the Lord and bring healing to your marriage.

Would you be concerned if your husband or wife read your emails or Instant
Messages? What about listened to your phone calls? What about if they knew
every place you go each day? How about the places you go when you are out of
town? Would you worry if your husband or wife heard a tape of all the
conversations you had each day with people of the opposite sex? If the
answer to any of these questions is "yes," God is speaking to you today.
Please, listen since your marriage is at stake.


In His love and service,
Your friend and brother in Christ,
Bill Keller
http://www.liveprayer.com/

Love is a choice, a decision!

I like this article because it is a perfect example of how love (true lasting love) is a choice and a decision.

Governor Mark Sanford made a huge mistake as he let himself fall into sin. Sin ALWAYS has victims. Not only is he and the women he had an affair with hurting, but sadly, the pain of his affair is felt deeply by his wife and children and others close to him.

However, he is now making the right choice and stepped forward to confess and apologize despite the ridicule.

He is now putting all of his effort into rebuilding his marriage. I wonder, what would his marriage and life be like now if he had not put all the effort he invested in his affair and instead put it into his marriage and wife.

This is a great lesson for everyone! Affairs are based on a lie and in the end creates many victims. Sin is only "fun" for a season and in the end hurts everyone. Instead of an affair, put that energy into the relationship you already have and invest in your spouse and your marriage.

~Marisela

For born-again governor, love is a matter of faith

by: ALLEN G. BREED

In one especially soul-baring e-mail to his Argentine mistress, South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford quoted from 1 Corinthians 13 about the nature of love.

It is patient and kind, he wrote. It is NOT jealous or boastful.

The Christian counselors Sanford sought out while trying to decide whether to stay with his wife or jump on a plane to South America advised him what else love is and isn't.

"Their point is that love is not a feeling," Sanford told The Associated Press in a tearful two-day confessional. "It's a choice. It's an action."

That sentiment might seem cold to many Americans, but it is perfectly consistent with the born-again, evangelical Christian world that Sanford inhabits, says sociologist John Bartowski.

"What evangelicals are doing is sort of carving out a subcultural view of love which is not so highly romanticized as we see in movies, that is at odds with the dominant view of love," says Bartowski, a professor at the University of Texas at San Antonio and author of the book, "Remaking the Godly Marriage: Gender Negotiation in Evangelical Families."

That world view, he says, "divorces" love from emotion, because "feelings are fleeting and not to be trusted."

"Love is something that is cultivated in the trenches of living a day-to-day relationship," says Bartowski. "That is not a Hallmark moment."

So while there are countless romantics out there urging Sanford to follow his heart, he can expect mostly tough love from his own spiritual community.

"The emotions are the icing on the cake," says Ben Witherington, a New Testament professor at Kentucky's Asbury Theological Seminary. "They're not the cake."

Witherington says feelings are a "notoriously unreliable guide" in personal relationships because they tend to change with time. Marriage is not just a commitment of will, he says, but a commitment before God.

"That's why, at a Christian wedding service, you don't say, 'I feel like' and 'I feel like.' You say, 'I will' and 'I will,' 'I do' and 'I do.'"

Sanford is a man writhing in agony as his emotions battle his sense of duty _ to his wife, to their four sons, to his office.

In one e-mail to his lover, Maria Belen Chapur, Sanford said to "sleep soundly knowing that despite the best efforts of my head my heart cries out for you, your voice, your body, the touch of your lips, the touch of your finger tips and an even deeper connection to your soul."

He told the AP on Tuesday that the past 8 1/2 years have been an emotional "wrestling match," a struggle "between one's heart and one's value system."

"A whole lot more than a simple affair," he said. "It's a love story. A forbidden one, a tragic one, but a love story at the end of the day."

That is not how he talks of his bond with Jenny Sanford.

"I do have a love for my wife," he told AP. "I do have a love for my boys. I do have a love for the farm. I do have a love for the world of ideas and politics."

What has also become clear over the past few days is that Sanford has decided _ at least for now _ to take his friends' advice and try to repair his marriage. The friend whose words appear to echo loudest is Warren "Cubby" Culbertson.

The owner of a court reporting business, Culbertson, 51, is an influential Bible study leader and considered a pillar of the state capital's Christian community. Sanford told him about the affair immediately after his wife discovered it in January, and Culbertson has been counseling the couple ever since _ even holding a monthlong spiritual "boot camp" at the governor's mansion.

Culbertson told the AP he believes that "everybody's vulnerable, and there are no boundaries on darkness." He does not dine alone with other women and keeps his office door open when he has a female visitor.

He says he has counseled many men "who have fallen in the position that Mark's in."

"Everybody starts with the same exact story: 'We got to be friends. We started talking. I didn't mean for anything to happen,'" he says. "That's exactly where a sin begins."

Many times during the past week, Sanford has quoted Culbertson and others almost verbatim in describing where things went astray.

"It was innocent," he said of his first meeting on a beachside Uruguayan dance floor with Chapur. "That was the beginning of sin right there. ... If you're a married guy, at the end of the day, you shouldn't be dancing with somebody else."

Culbertson has advised Sanford to stay with his wife. If Sanford works diligently, he believes the couple can find an even "greater love" than they once had.

The Rev. Gary Chapman agrees.

A senior associate pastor at Calvary Baptist Church in Winston-Salem, N.C., Chapman has been a marriage counselor for 35 years. He has written several books, most notably "The Five Love Languages."

Chapman says Sanford is in the throes of what he calls the "in-love experience."

"It's not that there is not emotion involved in love," he says. "But the 'in-love' experience is super emotion. It's very euphoric. It doesn't take any effort. You're just pushed along by your emotions."

That high doesn't last, Chapman warns. Rather than seek that high over and over, he counsels couples to stick with the commitment they've already made and learn how to "keep love alive."

A faded love can be reborn, he says. But it takes time _ and work.

"You don't sit around waiting for the emotional love to come back."

http://www.onenewsnow.com/Business/Default.aspx?id=588806